Thursday, May 20, 2010

Crawl

hold on wait *pulls up my iTunes*..let me find a song that i can vibe with right now to write this damn blog....
*still searches.....
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AHA! found it..
"everybody sees its you
I'm the one that lost the view
everybody says were through
I hope you havent said it too..."


awwww shugga dugga now Chris Brown

nowplaying Chris Brown-Crawl

now if u cant catch on to this song and what this blog could possibly be about then somethin is really wrong with ur remedial ass LOL...
now before i get into details on the reason behind this blog let me give u a lil background preview before u start havin that confused look like "huh?"
ima break it down for you about the recent ex....folks call him jeremy...for the CS users his name is JayMcFly(think he deleted his joint tho)...yes we met that way when i went GA(i kno right bold move buddy), anywho yeah we hung out chilled during the 5 months I was there in GA(why i was there so long? long story), got a lot in common and yadda yadda yadda we broke up because of two things..
1. i was moving back to MD
2. he broke up with me because of one lil small incident(went clubbin with my lil cousin and got so fucked up and high that night, and was too sick to even visit jeremy the next day so that made him upset) and we just wasnt seeing eye to eye

sooo i went on my 'fuck u negro' rant for about 2 weeks where I just deleted everything that reminded me of him..changed my number, deleted all of the pictures i had of him, deleted my y! messenger and made a new one..blocked him from my AIM(he's unblocked now)....since Dec(when I returned back to MD) me and jeremy slowly kept in touch...i was still hurt mostly because he let me go over something really dumb but around that time i was really goin through hell and the only person at the time who I knew was a good listener and is willin to keep it real and tell it like it is, no sugarcoat, would b him...so it grew a new shell of feelings for him....yea he admitted that he didnt want things to end the way it did and at the same time he wants to continue what we have and go further and see what the long distance can do for us...now i told him to pick up from the relationship from nov(when he let me go) would be wierd since i had trouble from my first long distance relationship but ANYWHO lets fast forward now....

"so where do we go from here
with all this fear in our eyes
and where can love take us now
we've been so far down
we can still touch the sky..."


yesterday me and him was on skype yesterday just havin a really good convo, laughin at each other, teasin(the norm)....basically im comin to visit him the 4th of july weekend to chill cause i just dont wanna be up here...and he's comin up here in august to see his aunt and to pay me a visit and ride with him to go to philly to go shopping....then of course the topic is being brought up about whether we will be together again...in my heart there is still a chance....now where does that leave me with my feelings about DJ? I mean really me and DJ are ever quite close and honestly would a relationship even establish between us? i sort of doubt it.....so will me and jeremy get back together? maybe(reason being that I'm moving back down there once my life is straight up here)....i will always and forever will care about jeremy no matter the circumstances...

..."if we crawl'till we can walk again
nd we'll run
Until we're strong enough to jump
And we'll fly
Until there is no end
So let's crawl...crawl....crawl
Back to love
Yeah
Back to love
Yeah"....

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